Monday, April 26, 2010

Life of an iPhone Developer

Well, high price, chick names and ‘techy’ attitude is what constitutes an iPhone developer. But they are no less than laborers. Mind my condition and opposition I am going to face for calling them that, but hello, freedom of expression, I am sure you must have heard about it.

Now why the hell am I writing on the life of an iPhone developer of all the pretty things in the world?? My friend asked me to, so I am obliging. He asked for the bashing, and here it is, dedicated just for him. I am sure he is going to love this. Even if he doesn’t, I couldn’t care less, for I love bashing.

So let me explain what exactly is that these people do, for that section of my friends who are technologically uneducated. I don’t know. Coz I belong to the same group. All I know is their life is restricted to a white screen, some obscure looking language, code, long office hours, ass kicking work, life sucking clients, nose poking bosses, dreadful competition with handsome salaries and no time to spend. Well the last bit might not be true in each case. It can also be the other way round. Low salaries… still not time to spend.

Now for us, the non-technically gifted people, Apple might have done a world of good when they came out with the iPod, and I am sure most of us know only till that. But for these people it has wrecked havoc on their lives with constant updates of new products and life threatening features that are so bloody well sure to suck each and every single drop of your blood from your body if you try to integrate them in some random application for a random guy in some random corner of the world.

Not to forget that they already have lost the minute, more softer pleasures of life like watching a bug fly…oh did I say bug…. no that’s a crime…for this one word can take up their whole weekend for them set it free…I mean make the application bug free.

Sorry for being so haphazardly random jumping from one word to the other with no connection, actually I am just trying to show the mental setup of our much celebrated iPhone developer here. So I was saying as they have already lost the softer side of their nature, there is more to add to their misery… life is even difficult if you are born and are working in the State of The Man, Mahatma Gandhi. For Gujarat is a dry state. No ‘daru’ to have a pleasant evening after a long day of ass slogging. So in this case they have to go satisfy themselves, falsely, by having soda named ‘Beer’ at the local shop. And by the way, it is one of the most popular flavors here in Gujarat.